If it turns out that there is a
God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is
that, basically, he's an underachiever.
Woody Allen
Seriousness is the only refuge of
the shallow.
Oscar Wilde
You think quantum
physics has the answer? I mean, you know, what purpose does it serve for me
that time and space are exactly the same thing? I mean I ask a guy what time it
is, he tells me 6 miles? What the hell is that?
Woody Allen
The only thing that sustains one
through life is the consciousness of the immense inferiority of everybody else.
And that is a feeling that I have always cultivated.
Oscar Wilde
On the plus side, death is one of
the things that can be done just as easily lying down.
Woody Allen
Everyone should keep someone else's
diary.
Oscar Wilde
I promised students
of my class I'm gonna take them to the Caravaggio exhibit at the Metropolitan Museum. You know, I try to give them a little culture now and then so they don't beat each other to death with bicycle chains all the time.